Confessions

I am a realist.

I do not look on the bright side of things, I do not look on the dark side of things.

I look at things as they really are.

Some people say my outlook on life is negative, morbid, or whatever.

The glass is neither half empty or half full, the glass just is as it is.

With life I tend to play it by ear because I don’t see a future. I sometimes dwell on the past too much, but I try to learn from it.

I am by no means creative. I do technical things. Straight commands like… “chop this, chop that”

I cannot write creatively. I cannot paint a beautiful picture. I cannot make an acceptable logo. I don’t think I could write a decent song if my life depended on it.

I try to tell things how they are and some people don’t like that, or simply can’t accept it.

I am a nice guy, or at least I try to be. But being the nice guy has got me nowhere in life, and I’m not too fond of that fact.

I don’t look for the worst in people, but it’s what I have seen from most. I see the real side of people. I see that most people (again) not all, most will betray anyone for their own benefit… Even those they “love”.

People will lie. Some people are honorable. More are not.

I am not making this entry to put anyone down, or to piss people off.

I have been told I am depressed. Severely depressed to be exact. They’re correct… And I have been for over a year

Few know the details of why I am this way. One person has seen me at my lowest, and he is the only one who has confronted me about this. I thank him for caring.

I have been told I need professional help. But I only need to help myself. But until, and after, I am able to do that…

I remain a realist.