Rejection

March 9th, 2006

Since I’m unemployed I am obviously trying to find a new job. I am being very selective right now as it is not imperative that I have a job for a few more weeks. I found this on my computer and thought it might be of some use.

Dear Sir or Ma’am,

Thank you for your letter rejecting my application for employment with your company.

I have received rejections from an unusually large number of exceptionally well qualified organizations. With such a varied and promising spectrum of rejections from which to select, it is impossible for me to consider them all. After careful deliberation, then, and because a number of firms have found me more unsuitable, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your rejection.

Despite your company’s outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet with my requirements at this time. As a result, I will be starting employment with your firm on the first of the month.

Circumstances change and one can never know when new demands for rejection arise. Accordingly, I will keep your letter on file in case my requirements for rejection change.

Please do not regard this letter as a criticism of your qualifications in attempting to refuse me employment. I wish you the best of luck in rejecting future candidates.

Sincerely,

Scott Harvey

2 Responses to “Rejection”

  1. Justin Says:

    First, lose the word rejection. When you turned in your application did they turn you around and say, “Sorry sir, we’re rejecting your application?” Rejection is different from, not accepting, or them not wanting you.

    Keep your head up mate

  2. Scott Says:

    Justin, I think you completely missed the point. I’ts a joke.

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